School has always been something that just *clicked* with me; I enjoyed it and I put pressure on myself to succeed [type-A personality, some would say]. By contrast, my younger sister is wired for an entirely different circuit; one with loops and junctions and dead ends. Neither is a better nor worse way of viewing the world but there is much to be gained by having insight into the other’s mind. I wanted to share with you her open letter to Adderall, which gave me goosebumps and really showed how much the school system had let her slip through the cracks. This girl is a total game changer and I couldn’t be more proud of her. Enjoy!
After extensive research and many visits to the doctor, I’m finally getting to know you. My research tells me that your main purpose in my life is to stimulate the central nervous system that helps with hyperactivity and impulse control in my brain. In simpler terms, it helps me stay focused. Without you, I can’t sit still, I talk frequently, and I say the first thing that comes to mind. Sometimes it’s really fun and makes a lot of people laugh but other times, I get in trouble for it. I don’t think my teachers know that I can’t control it.
Before you, there were good days and bad days; sometimes I could sit down in class and actually finish an assignment but on most days, I couldn’t get more than my name on the paper. The minds of people with ADD are so interesting; we’re thinking about nothing and everything all at once. “I know I’m supposed to be writing my paper, but did anyone else notice that kid’s bedhead? What’s today’s date? Man that girl chews her apples loudly.”
My friends know that I have ADD. Not only because I’ve told them, but also because it’s obvious after just one conversation with me. I’m constantly being reminded to finish one story before I start another. The littlest things become such an ordeal for me. For instance, I have mastered the art of taking four hours to clean my bedroom. When I have you, I feel more focused and relaxed.
I’ve been with you for about four months now and let me tell you, you’re not perfect. My friends can tell when I’m with you because I’m not “Sophia”. I don’t say random things, talk in class, or whistle every song that comes to mind. You don’t make me happy but you don’t make me sad either. Sometimes you make me cry for no reason and sometimes the fact that I’m crying for no reason makes me laugh.
Most importantly, I want to thank you. Because of you, I received my first 4.0 GPA this year and was invited to my school’s academic achievement award party for the first time in my life. Because of you, the idea of going to college with my brother and sister doesn’t seem impossible anymore. Because of you, I am more determined than ever to become a teacher and make a difference in the lives of young children who are square pegs trying to fit into a round hole. For all of that, I am eternally grateful.
Please feel free to share in the comments below YOUR experience with adderall or ADD.
2 thoughts on “An Open Letter To Adderall || Guest Post”
I too started to take Adderall at the age of 35 and this letter is EXACTLY how I too feel. Mostly what I feel is sad that people don’t understand and sad that there is so much stigma because so many people abuse this drug. For me, it was hard to start it emotionally. I didn’t want to have to take a drug to be “normal-ish.” And slowly I’m accepting that it’s okay to be me and to not be perfect. I like me the way I am. 🙂
Thank you so much for sharing your experience! My sister agrees completely–it has been a long process of finding the right pill and dosage for her. I’m so happy for both of you that there is a drug out there that has made a difference but so sad for all of the unwanted side effects and personality changes that can accompany the benefits 😦
Thanks so much for your comment and I apologize for the extremely delayed response. School was taking all of my time and attention for the last few weeks!